Friends are a pertinent part of a man’s life, and we always like to be surrounded by friends. Friendships are bound to get deeper as time progresses, but what if your best friend is a narcissist and already has control over your life? What is a narcissist? Well, narcissists are people who believe they are superior to others and live off of other people’s adulation and praise. They consider themselves extremely important, and any criticism of them would result in anger. In our life span, we will come across many narcissistic people, and we should begin to worry if we have a narcissistic friend who already has control of things in our life. Here is an article by Shitij Rao to understand how a narcissist behaves and signs that you might have a narcissistic friend.
Which person can be called a Narcissist?
Narcissists are attention-seeking people who possess personality traits such as overestimating their personal importance. They like to be appreciated and acknowledged, even if their behaviour is not worthy of acknowledgment. They try to manipulate and take control over other people’s lives through deceit and intimidation. In their subconscious, a narcissistic person may have a fragile sense of self that does not reflect on the outside, but rather a fabricated sense of hyper-superiority complex.
Signs that your friend is a Narcissist
Narcissists are addicted to being significant, and they live off narcissistic supply as their “drug.” Apart from that, they try to take control of someone’s life and impose themselves. If your friend exhibits any of the following behaviours, you are at risk:
Cutting you off from your network of supporters
Making you believe certain things through intimidation or deceit
Disillusioning you at times and making you question your own judgement
To get close to you, over-praise you.
Trying to control your life
Demeaning you and then saying something positive to create a bond
They are always attempting to portray themselves as a great friend, without whom you will be lost
Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)
NPD is a personality disorder where a person shows signs of extreme self-importance and self-admiration. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5) describes NPD as possessing at least five of the following nine criteria.
A grandiose sense of self-importance
Preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
Believing that they are “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions).
Requiring excessive admiration
A sense of entitlement (unreasonable expectations of getting special treatment or being given what they want automatically)
Being interpersonally exploitative (taking advantage of others to achieve their own ends)
Lacking empathy (unwilling to recognise or identify with the feelings and needs of others)
Often being envious of others or believing that others are envious of them
Displaying arrogant, haughty attitudes or behaviours
How does a person become ‘Narcissist’
Narcissistic behaviour can sometimes be categorised as a personal choice, but it is just way beyond that. Narcissistic people are often living in disillusionment about themselves; they are fragile on the inside and, as a cover, project a completely different exterior. People with narcissistic personality disorder have different reasons for their behaviour, not something specific. Early childhood trauma, over-pampered or under-praised children, genetics, etc. are reasons to trigger narcissistic behaviours in individuals. Initially, people who grow up with a weak sense of self are more likely to exhibit narcissistic behaviours.
How to identify Narcissists and stay away from them
Educate yourself about narcissists and their behaviour. If a certain individual indulges in the traits mentioned above and they are repetitive and toxic, you need to stay away from them. Read more articles like these to educate yourself better.
Create boundaries so the person may not be able to cross them and try to overpower your personality.
Speak up if you think someone is trying to create undue interference in your life, and the best thing is to detect it early, confront the individual, and make your priorities clear.
In A Nutshell
Narcissism is not just about someone being himself or herself; it is way beyond that and a compulsive disorder, and the toxicity will affect you in a big way if immediate remedies are not taken. Narcissists do not change overnight; they have become so for a variety of reasons that have been nurtured over time. Men should be wary of such individuals, take a stand, and speak up. Narcissistic individuals have the ability to play mind games through intimidation and deceit, which men should be conscious of.