With our world becoming digitised and apps taking over our lives, even dating lives, it has become quite convenient for men (introverts) to showcase a side of them that was not so evident when socialisation happened on the physical sphere. In the recent past, one liners and intro lines have become interesting and the need of the hour.
On dating apps, it is required that men come up with quirky one liners to impress their ‘match’. Well, then what happens when those online matches become a physical date? Either the women likes your introvertness even on the date and are okay with your weird attitude that is trying to figure the next topic of conversation while being on the first one. The second option is the date becomes an epic fail.
When it comes to starting a conversation with a woman, most men have no clue about where to begin. Should they initiate by flirting? Or should they start by talking about themselves? How should they introduce themselves? They have no idea what to do and how to begin.
The truth is that talking to a woman is a skill that not every man knows. While some men are quite smooth in having a conversation with women, some men just look at them in awe.
However, it doesn’t mean that you cannot learn how to talk to a woman. It might not be an easy skill to learn but with practice you will be able to ace it.
Whether you are going on a first date with that crush of yours’ or want to talk to that cute girl on the subway, we have a few tips for you that will help you out in talking to a woman without sweating your head off. Read on to have a look at these tips:
Whether you are a shy and introvert or an adventurous and extrovert guy, it’s always better to be what you are and show your real personality rather than a fake one. Often men try to pretend to be someone else that they are not, however, that doesn’t last for long. Be who you really are and it just might work out for the both of you.
The truth is that women want to feel special when they talk to a man and even if they are sexually attracted to you, it doesn’t mean that they are going to give you their contact.
It’s important that you make a woman feel comfortable while talking to them. Making vulgar comments about them is a big no-no. And if they have to leave, no matter where you guys have met, do let them leave rather than asking them to stay. It’s a big red flag.
Humour is the key
Women love men who are funny and if you can make jokes and make them laugh, you can be their favourite. The best part of being a jokester is that you will be able to break the ice rather than just being awkward and silent. Whether it’s your first date or a girl you have met at a bar, telling jokes always works.
You can even tell a joke while introducing yourself to her. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a goofy pick-up line or a cheesy joke, it will create a comfy and lightened atmosphere for the rest of the conversation. Along with that, starting the conversation with a joke can make the woman believe that you have a good sense of humour and don’t take life too seriously.
However, making vulgar, sexist, racist and crass jokes won’t work in this case. It will only lead to making a bad impression of you and we don’t think you want that.
Make Eye Contact
Making eye contact while talking to a woman is very important. If you are looking here and there during the conversation, it will only make her believe that you are not interested in her. Apart from that, it will also show that you have low self-confidence as well as low self-esteem.
However, making eye contact doesn’t mean that you keep on staring at her without blinking! Do smile a bit while talking to her and making eye contact. Make sure that you have a confident body language. If you are sitting, don’t slouch, but move towards her in a way that she feels comfortable as well as safe.
Keeping an eye contact during the conversation is a big indicator of your interest in her. And, let’s be honest, we all want some kind of validation that the person sitting next to us is actually interested in the conversation. So make sure to not look at your phone while having the conversation.
Women love compliments and they deserve one from you during a conversation. So whether her hair looks great in those curls or her blue eyes look dazzling, compliment her as soon as she arrives for the date. Tell her how amazing she looks in that black dress (or perhaps red, we don’t know yet) and make her smile. You could even compliment her about her beautiful smile. No matter what makes her look great, tell her about it. Nothing makes a woman more happy than a compliment!
Apart from her physical appearance, there is much more you could compliment her about. For instance, if you like her taste in music or she is a good artist, you could compliment her about that as well. There are uncountable things to compliment a woman about and you should be able to find a few for sure.
Find Something in Common
The best way to start a conversation is to find common ground. If you find that you both studied from the same college, start from there. You can talk about your former professors as well as the campus and how awesome college was. If not, talk a bit about each other’s hobbies; you can find something in common there. Perhaps, you both like the same kind of music, like to read, are into psychology or were in a band as teenagers. Anything will work like a charm when you find something in common.
This will make you talk more about it and both of you will start bonding over that coffee date. However, if you have just met a woman at a party and have no idea how to find something in common, you can just ask her how she knows the host of the party. It will certainly lead to a conversation and you might find a date for the next day as well.
This is the easiest part of the conversation with a woman. Although you would love to talk about yourself, your high-paying job and expensive car, it’s better to zip it and let the woman talk about herself as well. As you have initiated the conversation, she would like to talk about herself as well (unless you turn out to be a creep) so let the lady tell you about herself.
She can turn out to be quite interesting and it can lead to an amazing connection between the two of you. For instance, if you have just complimented her about her hazel eyes, she could say that she is just wearing hazel lenses, where you might end up saying that you wear coloured lenses too. This is just an example; there are multiple ways you guys can bond over when she tells you about herself.
Don’t Talk About Your Ex
Whether it’s your first date or you have just met a woman at a coffee shop, don’t even think of talking about your ex-girlfriend during a conversation. Not only it turns off a woman but is also an instant conversation killer. She might make up an excuse and leave you there all alone thinking what went wrong.
Remember, a woman is not a therapist so don’t load your emotional baggage on her. And when you bring in your ex partner into the conversation she will only believe that you are still into your ex rather than her, which we know is not true. So why even talk about the past?
Even if your past relationship ended on a sour note, you need to stop thinking about it and believe that you can find a new, positive and healthy relationship.
Women are not someone you need to decode, whether she is the girl next door or a glamorous model, it isn’t that hard to talk to a woman. All you need is some patience and these skills. So the next time you find a girl you like and would like to take her on a date, talk to her like we have told you. But remember, patience is the key; no need to hurry.
We understand that you might feel that talking to a woman is tough. You might be scared of rejection or worse, getting insulted. However, talking to women isn’t rocket science; it is much easier than you can think of and you can certainly pull it off.
Be a natural at having a conversation with any woman. Such skills will boost your confidence as well as self-esteem which will only lead to having a better conversation with a lady.