Society has made sure that the matters of our bedroom remain behind closed doors. This not only creates a communication barrier but also makes sure that men are not able to share matters that might even be troubling to them. Talking about sex with friends not only breaks down this barrier but also creates opportunities to learn and accept.
Sex. A taboo word that is always talked about in hushed voices—have you ever noticed that even though it is talked about in hushed voices, it is still talked about? Many might even think that it is actually one of the world’s most talked-about topics. Be it in the form of innuendos, jokes, behind the curtains, or even when someone is referring to those double talks,
Why? Well, the credit again falls on the shoulders of our society. When we are told from a very early age not to be so open about 'it," the ‘it’ automatically becomes a mystery to be solved. We have all spent ages figuring out our bodies, how babies are made, and whatnot.
In the absence of sex education, it is only natural that many young people turn to those powerful yet unrealistic images of adult cinema. Or there are others who will turn to their friends and try to understand what exactly the meaning of certain organs in their body is.
Yes, we are quite aware that when we turn to unofficial sources to understand the concepts of sexual health, many non-verified facts and even myths are passed along. Although, let’s try to keep those judging hats aside for a minute.
Should talking about sex and sexual health with friends be such a no-no? In my very personal opinion, I definitely do not think so. And just now, if you raised your eyebrow and have even put that judging hat back on for my above statement, I urge you to read on:
Demystifies the Taboo
A big fact of our society lies in not so openly talking about things that are, in general, found embarrassing. Let’s try not to delve into the why; otherwise, we will end up spending a lot of our time here.
Anything that comes even remotely close to our intimate area is considered taboo. No matter that all of it is still part of our body, having a healthy sexual life is as important as our mental and physical health. Once you open up those doors of communication, you are not only giving yourself the opportunity to grow but also becoming a part of the goodwill to destroy those taboos.
Once you break out of the awkward conversation and have a free-flowing conversation with your friends about sex, you make them aware that you do not consider this topic taboo. They will start seeing you as someone with an open mind, and they will also start appreciating and coming to you for more healthy discussions.
Men are always taught to keep their feelings and thoughts to themselves. But once you have broken this barrier with your friends, you will find a new sense of closeness with them.
It makes you more open to your partner
Once you have opened the gates of communication, it will make you realize the different ways that they use to communicate with their partner. This will give you the confidence to be more open, bold, and understanding. Resulting in a relationship with your partner that is built on open communication and helps you both understand each other’s needs and desires.
When one becomes more ready to talk about things that they thought should only be discussed behind closed doors, they discover and learn things that others are doing. Talking and being open to talking about sex gives you the unique opportunity to become more open to listening. When you develop this habit, it will automatically result in you and your partner becoming more and more available to each other.
Makes fetishes normal and acceptable
Another opportunity that opens its doors once you have started talking about sex with your friends is that you start understanding fetishes, needs, and desires in a more open and acceptable way. You get to know that every individual is different and has different versions of pleasure. You understand that there is nothing that is taboo in this world. We were all taught to be hush-hush just because the previous generation had their own boundaries for several things.
You start accepting, and with time, you even start being more adventurous and interesting in your own bedroom. These discussions will give you ideas to rethink and reorient.
You get to learn
You get to learn a lot. Not only different ideas about and around sex but also how different people react to different situations. You get to learn not just about sex but also about people and their tendencies to react to different situations.
Even though society considers it taboo to talk about sex, and there are many who might also be of the opinion that the privacy of our bedrooms should just remain there, it is important to discuss sex with friends. Even though the topic is a private matter, when not discussed at all, it closes down the opportunity to learn, adapt, enjoy, and dream.
Written by: Akanksha Bajpai
Edited by: Aniket Joshi