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How do Emotions Affect Men’s Sex Drive?

By: Aakriti Gupta

Have you ever encountered a situation where you have come home from work with a bouquet of roses in your hands to excite your partner but he/she is sitting on the sofa all grumpy giving you subtle signals to grapple? Sucks right! All that frisking hots just vanished within a second. The reason behind this is our emotions have their reigns over our sex drive and can swing us from being all cheery to sulky if something goes amiss.

Stereotypically, men are adjudged to only physically exist when savouring sexual intercourse, unlike the other partner (if the partner is female) who is regarded as being emotionally invested and connected to him during the act.

Somewhere, this perception reflects the mainstream notion of toxic masculinity. We are here to debunk this myth to some extent. For men as well, sex can be the ultimate expression of love and intimacy or an emotional roller coaster, depending upon their omnium gatherum of emotions.

Does Sex have an Emotional Side too, For Men?

Men also feel the first twinge of excitement when women make them laugh till they cry out of joy. Emotionally committed men recognize sex as a safe path to verbalize their emotional vulnerability through a sexual connection with their partner.

Men’s desire to be close-knit with their partners gives them butterflies in their stomachs. Being desired by his partner as well at the end of the drowsy day fills them with reassurance in the relationship.

*According to research published in The Journal of Health and Social Behaviour, sex can lessen the stress hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol and stimulates the production of endorphins that boost your happiness.

Men expect their partners to be present on the same page of sexual excitement as they are, to feel fancy and cared for. But what kind of sensation turns out, if their emotional needs are not adequate to sustain their sex drive?

When Sex Become an Emotional Coaster For Men!

While in bed, they tumble down their walls too. Revealing themselves completely to their partner is not child’s play for men (no matter how much childishness is hidden in their hearts). Men usually don’t have other emotional support like women do to talk about their sex drive and desires more brazenly.

So, when they do it’s something special and unique. The gladdening way to do that seems now and then is to get physically close with their partner and do some crazy pillow talk.

If men are not mentally prepared or feel a high sex drive at the moment, indulging in sex affairs can lead to a rush of actions and thoughts eventuating into a situation where neither of the partners grows into feeling wanting or connected.

Erratically, detachment due to fights going on over a long period of time can turn men’s sex drive into dust. Even if they do indulge, men can perhaps miss out a lot.

Sex is not narrowly for sexual pleasure but emotional connectivity and rejection in any form from their partner can be personal to them. The situation usually spirals, leading to a breakup, stress, and anxiety.

Can Stress Increase Men’s Sex drive as Well?

In so many relationships, men tend to reconcile with their partners through sexual intercourse if they feel unhitched from them. For men, sex perhaps can be psychological support throughout such grueling times.

So many times, stress is a pep pill that hauls men closer to their partners soaring their sex drive. Sex and Stress can both work as both foes and friends (as most of our work colleagues does).

Irregular sex (leading to stress and anxiety) can be seen as a sign by men that their partner has fallen out of love which generally leads to a higher sex drive to ensure the relationship’s survival.

Mostly, men’s style of attachment in times of anxious circumstances forges a desire to be physically connected with their partner to feel safer and validated. The more sex, the more love and appreciation men feel.

During such course, men’s body generates oxytocin which is also called a ‘love hormone’ that stimulates the feelings of warmth and relaxation making them close to their boo after partnered sex.


Men’s sexual self is too deeply intertwined with a vast array of hidden emotions. Sex can be their comfort zone placing their and their partner’s emotions in proximity. It’s men’s thoughts, emotional trance, and bond with their partner that tie their sex drive with their sensations.


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